Author: Mermaid

the bravest idiot i know

the bravest idiot i know

my father has an age old saying that i’ve honestly heard more times than i care to count. “it can’t always be them, xan. sometimes, it has to be you.” every time he’s ever said it to me in the past, i’ve wished for the courage to sock him in the nose. largely, because he […]

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the eggsecution of my left hand

the eggsecution of my left hand

when i was in college, i saw the audrey hepburn / humphrey bogart classic movie “sabrina.” in the movie, sabrina, the poor yet beautiful daughter of a magnificently wealthy family’s chauffeur, is sent to a paris culinary school, where she is supposed to learn to be a domestic like her father. the problem is, she’s in […]

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so my nifty difty stop watch told me that even though i only kicked half a mile in 30 min, i burned 479 calories. generally an hour with a mile and some extra laps comes in at about 700ish calories. a) swimming is awesome crazy calorie burning madness and b) just kicking is way harder than swimming.

- mermaid

my mile came in at 56:42 but i fat fingered the watch and deleted my time before i could take a picture of it. next time. until then, i am grateful i swam and grateful the pool has reopened. spring can't get here fast enough, but at least there's an indoor lane waiting for me until then.

- mermaid

because i love myself enough to swim

because i love myself enough to swim

i have been trapped in one of those horror movies where there’s only one character: me – and i’m doing all the terrorizing. it’s been rough to say the least. eight days ago, the merman went away on business leaving me and lil’ flipper on our own. we had a fun week planned swimming, science […]

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“that smells like popcorn and revolting pizza”

“that smells like popcorn and revolting pizza”

i was somewhere around the bouncy castle, on the edge of the blowers, when the hunger began to take hold. i remember saying something like “that smells like popcorn and revolting pizza.” then my stomach betrayed me. it growled with lust. sometimes, i’m great and i stick to it and everything is perfect and space […]

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mile came in at 43:01. much better. plus i did another 1/3 of a mile in remaining 16:59. #youtakethatwednesday

mermaid

today’s mantra:  everything i do is for me, not them

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fighting the flu

fighting the flu

between fighting off the flu and getting the website up, it’s been a crazy weekend / few days. more times starting tomorrow.

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your energy is finite. only use it for the betterment of you and others.

- mermaid

today’s mantra: always be yourself. unless you can be a mermaid. then, be a mermaid.

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today’s mantra: i’m so totally worth the effort.

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Chocolate Coconut Date Bars

Chocolate Coconut Date Bars

these are our go-to on-the-go snack. 10 minutes total to make and so delicious. i always keep my fridge, gym bag, and my belly (post workout) stocked with these and a piece of fruit and a green smoothie / juice. rich and velvety, they taste like mounds fudge. and ain’t nothing wrong with that. be […]

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it's only when everything goes wrong that we're free to see how truly good we have it.

- mermaid

easy rice cooker oatmeal for swim day

easy rice cooker oatmeal for swim day

1 cup regular oats, 2 cups water, 1 knob of butter, coconut oil, whatever you want, click on. it’ll be done in 15-20. makes enough for two adults and one tyrant toddler – so adjust for however many people you’re feeding. set the cooker to go as soon as you wake up at the same […]

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today’s mantra: my pain doesn’t define me

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every time i walk into my closet, i have a fear attack.

every time i walk into my closet, i have a fear attack.

something weird keeps happening to me. every time i walk into my closet, i have a fear attack. not a panic attack. a fear attack. i am suddenly paralyzed by fear. in an effort to invest in myself and this new “me,” i removed all the plus-size stuff out of my closet and got rid […]

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my mile came in at 58:49. so i did another 100 just because. and to think i was going to stay home.

- mermaid

today’s mantra: anything a bully says is white noise.

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i am a bit of a spoiled princess. i admit it

i am a bit of a spoiled princess. i admit it

i’m super grateful for the bully that called me “disabled” at the y. i know what you’re thinking, “what? really? thankful for a hateful bully?” yes. you better believe i am grateful for her, because her hate speak taught me an invaluable lesson. i am a bit of a spoiled princess. i admit it. i […]

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thank you for the love and messages

thank you for the love and messages

i have received dozens of special notes from friends new and old, family and total strangers thanking me for sharing my story, and letting me know i was inspiring them on their own journeys to heath and wellness. i just wanted to say how deeply flattered i am because i’m just doing my thing, you […]

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i’ve only ever done things the s&m way

i’ve only ever done things the s&m way

i’ve only ever done things the s&m way. it’s such a barbaric approach to life, but i would swim all-day, seven days, sleep four minutes, do a 1000 craft projects, clean the house, cook enough food to feed brazil, write a novel and probably a movie, go take some photos, and play a 15-hour game […]

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my mile came in at 42:58. that's awesome. plus i had to circle swim for 1/3 of that mile. really pushed me hard, but that time rocks!

- mermaid

i woke up in real agony this morning

i woke up in real agony this morning

i woke up in real agony this morning. there were bedroom tears (the worst kind) as the merman had to lift the covers off of me because i was too weak to get up without help. it was depressing and humiliating to say the least. even though the merman had a similar surgery to mine […]

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real warriors know when to wait and when to pounce.

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Flip Turns Made Easy

Flip Turns Made Easy

  i mentioned in an earlier post about messing up a flip turn. for you all out there who are new to swimming and can’t imagine what i’m referring to, this is it. when it’s done right, it’s floating perfection and a seemingly effortless movement. when it’s done wrong, you look like you’re drowning – […]

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Change Takes Time

Change Takes Time

we buy the giant minced garlic at our house because i love it in an unreasonable abundance, and now via stockholm syndrome, so does my family. when a recipe calls for 1 minced glove of garlic, i wave my hand like ‘pishaw!” and say, “sissies! it’s at least 5 cloves.” what can i say? i […]

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Ready for Swim

Ready for Swim

the rice cooker for oatmeal is working. my and my boy’s suit and towels all ready for my morning swim workout / lesson for lil’ flipper. just enough time left for morning yoga to get us limber for the day and to slice up some cantaloupe for a post workout snack. can’t wait to ‪#‎swim‬!

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today’s mantra: there is no yesterday, just today – own it.

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